Five with Fry
Five with Fry is your go-to podcast for understanding conflict—where it comes from, why it shows up, and how to handle it with clarity and intention. On each episode, Dr. Jen Fry breaks down the moments we avoid, the reactions we default to, and the skills it takes to move through conflict without blowing things up or shutting down.
Episodes
77 episodes
S4 Ep5: The Secret Bribery Ring That Doesn't Exist
You've probably said some version of it. "I didn't pay all this money for you to play like that." Maybe out loud, maybe in your head on the drive home, maybe half-joking. This episode is about where that sentence actually lands.It doesn'...
S4 Ep4: Youth Sports Were Never Meant to Be Fair
Playing time is where I've watched more parents come undone than almost anything else. Not because they're difficult people, but because the rotation pokes at something real. Fairness. Pride. The fear sitting under all of it. And the first pivo...
S4 Ep3: You're Not the Coach in That Car
Your kid gets in the car and asks you the question. What am I doing wrong?And most of us answer it. We say you're too slow, or you need to get lower, or the coach has favorites and there's nothing you can do. We say something. B...
S4 Ep2: Don't Be A Lawnmower
There's a version of youth sports parenting where the job feels simple: get them there, feed them, cheer, repeat. And then something goes sideways — the shoe won't tie, the meal's a disaster, a teammate thing has them stewing in the back seat —...
S4 Ep1: More Than the Chauffeur
Most of what a sports parent does has nothing to do with sports. It's gear. It's scheduling. It's "did you remember your cleats" texted at 6:45 in the morning. Parents get so good at the doing that the harder question almost never gets asked: <...
S3 Ep8: Coming Back on Monday From a Retreat That Actually Works
A retreat can feel productive while it is happening. People talk more honestly. The tension lowers. The team gets a little space from the pressure of the regular schedule. But if leaders have not named the real problem before the agenda is buil...
S3 Ep7: A Retreat Isn’t Success Until Hard Conversations Continue On Monday
A retreat can give people enough space to finally say the thing out loud. That matters. But naming the conflict is not the same as resolving it.In this episode, Jen talks about what happens when teams come back from a retreat with good c...
S3 Ep6: A Retreat Can’t Carry What Leaders Avoid
A retreat can’t carry everything leadership has been avoiding.When leaders wait until everyone is in the room to finally name the real issues, the retreat starts from defense instead of honesty. People are surprised. They get guarded. An...
S3 Ep5: You Can’t Call It Safe Without Accountability
Calling a retreat a safe space is only the beginning.If leaders have not decided what accountability looks like inside that space, people are being asked to trust a promise that may not hold once someone gets uncomfortable. That matters,...
S3 Ep4: Your Offsite Doesn’t Need More Trust Falls
Most retreats promise alignment and come-home energy, yet teams often return to the same old friction by Monday. We open the curtain on why that happens and make a bold case: conflict isn’t a problem to avoid at an offsite, it’s the work that m...
S3 Ep3: Reset Expectations, Repair Gaps, Rebuild Culture
You can learn a lot about a team from the second after somebody says the thing everybody has been avoiding. That pause tells the truth fast. Somebody usually tries to rescue the room, smooth it over, or move on before anyone has to sit in what ...
S3 Ep2: More "Good Vibes" is Not a Culture Strategy
You can build a retreat around laughter, bonding, and a packed schedule and still come back to the exact same tension. That is the problem Jen names here. When teams keep asking how to make the retreat fun before they name what is actually off,...
S3 Ep1: Why Most Retreats Fail Before They Start
Everybody usually knows why the retreat is happening before the retreat ever starts. The problem is that teams often build the agenda around relief instead of clarity. So people leave with photos, a few good moments, and the same tension waitin...
S2 Ep9: Conflict Isn't the Villain
This season kept coming back to the same place: leadership starts with self. Not with strategy. Not with authority. With your patterns.Conflict does not come out of nowhere. Your responses were shaped long before this role, this team, or...
S2 Ep8: "I’m Sorry You Felt That Way" is a Trash Apology
Repair is where leadership gets exposed.Not when things are smooth. Not when the meeting goes well. After you interrupt someone. After you dismiss a concern. After you get it wrong.Most leaders don’t struggle with saying “I’m sorr...
S2 Ep7: How Fast Will They Tell You You’re Wrong?
Leaders love to say their door is always open. That sounds generous. It also keeps you comfortable.Power doesn’t disappear because you’re approachable. It shows up in who has to walk toward you. It shows up in who speaks first in meeting...
S2 Ep6: Stop Calling It “Defensive” When It’s Just Questions
There’s a moment that happens in feedback conversations all the time. Someone asks a question or tries to explain their perspective, and the response is, “You’re being defensive.” The label lands, and the door closes. What could have been dialo...
S2 Ep5: Congratulations on Winning That Imaginary Argument
Do you do this, too? Something feels off, and before you say a word, your brain writes a full script about what the other person meant, why they did it, and how it’s probably not great. I call this the “shower lawyer” habit, where y...
S2 Ep4: Emotional Regulation Isn't Optional
Conflict doesn’t break relationships. What breaks them is unmanaged emotion. The moments where we shut down, get sharp, avoid the conversation, or expect other people to absorb what we haven’t dealt with ourselves. This episode is about that ga...
S2 Ep3: "Calm Down?" That Phrase Might Be Your Kryptonite.
Some words hit harder than they should. A comment like “calm down” can flip a switch in your body before your brain has a chance to weigh in. In this episode, I’m talking about what happens when you get triggered and what that reaction is actua...
S2 Ep2: When Meetings Get Spicy, Don’t Rake The Zen Garden
Most leadership problems show up in moments of tension. Not the dramatic blowups, but the everyday heat in meetings, feedback conversations, or decisions that carry weight. This episode is about what you do with yourself in those moments. The h...
S2 Ep1: Your Family’s Conflict Style Is Running Your Meetings
Leadership gets clearer when you stop avoiding the hard parts and start asking where your habits came from. In this episode, we dig into conflict roots. Those early lessons taught you whether to speak up, shut down, smooth things over, or push ...
Season 2: New Year, New Focus
Fresh starts are overrated. What actually changes us are the layers we’re willing to look at honestly.This season, Five with Fry is narrowing its focus to one thing: conflict. Not the dramatic kind—the everyday moments where thi...
51: We Don’t Need A New Me To Have A Breakthrough Year
We’re not doing “new year, new me.”We’re doing new year, same person—just less exhausted and more honest.2025 was a lot. And pretending it wasn’t doesn’t set you up for a breakthrough—it sets you up to quit by February. So ...
50: Cookie Decorating Broke Me, And That’s Okay
Some holidays don’t feel festive. They feel quiet in a way that echoes.If this is your first holiday alone, your kids are somewhere else, you’ve moved, divorced, or lost someone, the pressure to “make it special” can feel like way too mu...